Reprinted verbatim from the Metro Times Dubious Achievement Awards, February 2004 (January 5-11 issue, 2005)
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An Oakland County sheriff's deputy gets a surprise after a high-speed chase in pursuit of an errant pickup truck. Deputy Scott Howden tries to pull the driver over around 1AM on a Thursday after he runs a flashing red at Adams and Orion roads. The driver speeds off, then slams on his brake, forcing the deputy to swerve around. Then the driver rams the squad car from behind, bouncing it forward a couple of hundred feet. Howden gets out of his car and pulls his gun. Driver gets out of his truck and threatens to kill Howden. And here it gets weird: Driver swings a four-pound black poodle on a leash and tries to hit Howden -- who responds with Taser (doesn't stop him), nightstick (doesn't stop him) and pepper spray (finally stops him). The pooddle, now nicknamed Lucky by cops, goes to the Oakland County Animal Care Center, while the driver, facing charges including animal cruelty, is sent for psychiatric observation.
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Is it just me, or is this hilarious! Using a four-pound poodle as a weapon! Hahahahaha! That's like using chipmunks as grenades! Hahahahaha!
Hey, that's not funny, I lost a friend in college to a chipmunk grenade.
OK, its funny.
It's cruel, but I can't help thinking about the Doppler effect of a poodle yowling while being swung through a circular orbit.